My God is Slowly Dying

It pains me to write anymore, it pains because I have so much to say.

I am jobless
I am homeless (well I live in as an au pair)
I am peniless
I am far away from home and in so many ways I am loveless.

I am sinking into depression by the passing day, it haunts me like a ghost and gags me by my throat, I let out muffled sobs and I no longer know why I cry. I am becoming sick, sick of being directionless. Everyday I try to wake up to a new beautiful dawn but well troubles never leave me alone.

I am trying to sort things out, I really am. Believe in me this one last time, I just need a little more time. I too want to begin the new year fresh, like a snake that shed its skin.

Don't push me too far, I might just jump over the edge.

I am only human, a 23 year old young girl trying to get her foothold in a distant lonely land. No streets are not made of gold here, yes they may be old but certainly not gold! It is not easy, it is not as glamorous as it sounds, infact it is difficult.

And what Santa comes on a sledge during Christmas? Really?

My God is slowly dying.

But I won't give up; God can die and so can the devil but till I live I will fight the battle.